Counting Cross-stitches

I learned to enjoy handwork from my mother. She taught me to embroidery on dishcloths, pillowcases, and table runners. I don't do much embroidery anymore, but I use those skills when I do cross-stitching. My eyes are getting old and I have a hard time seeing those little squares but I just buy stronger reading classes and enlarge the patterns more. My next purchase may be a large magnifier to wear around my neck to help me see more clearly.

I wanted to leave something special for each of my grandchildren, so a few years ago I decided to stitch them each a Christmas stocking. I have completed three out of six stockings, and am working on the fourth one now, and loving every minute of it. But this weekend I learned a very valuable lesson that I would like to pass on.

In my crocheting and my cross-stitching I have learned to "cheat" a little. If I don't have the exact number of stitches on a row of an afghan, I can increase or decrease as needed and no one can ever tell. I am pretty cleaver at hiding my mistakes. I am also good at helping others hide theirs, or helping them make something look alright after they have reached the point they can't figure out what to do. One time a friend brought me an afghan she was working on because she was in desperate need of help. She had tried to undo some of her work and it just wasn't "undo-ing" correctly and she didn't know what was wrong. It didn't take me long to see she was unpicking from the wrong end, from the beginning of the rows instead of the end. I really had to work backward to get that cleared up.

A few weeks ago as I was working on the Christmas stocking I started working on a new area of the pattern. I counted very carefully over several squares to start this area because it used the same color of thread that I just finished using and I didn't want to change threads. I continued working on the new area until it was ready to be tied into the rest of the completed part. This is when I found it didn't fit in right. Somewhere in my counting I had gotten off, I had made a mistake.

Normally I would be able to just "cheat" a little and make it work, but it was too far off this time and the picture was going to be out of porportion. I have had to pick out the work I had worked on for several day. Would anyone have noticed the mistake? I don't know, perhaps not, but probably because it was about 3 rows off and would end up making everything look just a bit funny in that area.

How many times do we get "just a little bit off"? How many times do we try to cover up a little mistake? Many times our mistakes don't affect the total outcome and we can go on without any problems, the final picture look just fine. But how much "off" is too much? Where does the step happen that creates a problem that causes us to unpick our work?

Repentence is an "unpicking" process. We have to recognize that our mistake will cause a flaw in the big picture and we need to be willing to unpick the threads and correct that mistake. The Lord knows none of us are perfect and allows us to "blend" in our mistakes and still create a good picture of our lives. We don't have to unpick everything, just work around it to correct the wrongs. But there are times when we need to completely take those threads out and start that area again.

There are some threads in that area of my picture that can remain, as long as I selectively those that don't belong there. I am able to start over again and will have a better outcome than before. I have learned that it isn't always best to jump ahead and fill in areas before I work up to that spot. Take things section by section instead of jumping around. Work on one area of my life and get it right before jumping to another without the experience I need to make it right.

With the Lord's help I will be able to complete the picture of my life and all the threads will be in the right place with the right number of squares.

Happy Birthday

Today I realize that my mind really isn't working very well, and hasn't for about a month. First of all, today is Morgan's birthday and I remembered that, so that is one good thing. Dear Morgan, I hope you had a happy day. You are a sweet young girl and I love your big eyes and happy smile. You are a sweetie!
And then I looked back on this blog and saw that I didn't tell Alexis happy birthday on her day! It took me a while to think what I was doing and where I was on her birthday, then I remembered we were up to Morgan's house. Somehow I just didn't get onto my blog and update at that time. So Lexi, I know you had a happy birthday but I want to wish you one in public. It was a special day being your eighth birthday and you baptism was wonderful. I know Cassidy was honored to speak at it. We love you, too.

So, it is official. I am a forgetful Grandma. Everyone will just have to deal with it! But, hey, the last month of school causes brain death.

Happy birthday my two sweet girls!

Righteous Pride?

Is there such a thing as "righteous pride"? If there is, I am sure that was what I had this weekend. My husband and I had the wonderful priviledge of seeing our son graduate from A.T. Still University, Kirksville College of Osteopathic Medicine, in Kirksville, Missouri and receive his degree of Doctor of Osteopathic Medicine.

We are proud of all of our children, but this weekend I couldn't have been prouder of him. Being the crier that I am, my right eye leaked all through the ceremony. When we got to the auditorium most of the really good seats were taken, but then, there weren't very many really good seats. We walked around the perimeter of the room and found two seats together on the fourth row from the front, just in front of the steps that the graduates walked down after receiving their scroll and hoods. So in reality, they were great seats. The processional was very dignified, but we couldn't see the graduates at all, only the dignitaries who sat on the stage. The speaker was wonderful, giving a very good speech on being a caring doctor, and admonished the new doctors to be the kind of caring doctor that everyone deserves to have. I thought it was a wonderful speech.

We were so proud of our son as he walked across the stage and received his scroll and hood. We can now say "Our son, the doctor."

I remember a few years ago when Barrett was very young (was it 6th or 8th grade?). His leg was hurting him all the time and we finally took him to see the orthopedic surgeon, Dr. Heiner, who x-rayed his leg. The nurse brought in the x-ray and put it up on the viewer, then left us to wait for the doctor to come in and talk with us. Barrett looked at the x-ray and pointed out a darker, gray spot on one of the bones, and said, "That is a tumor but it will be alright." Dr. Heiner walked in, pointed to this same spot and said, "This is a tumor but it will be alright." So much for needing to go to medical school! Dr. Heiner explained something about a "water tumor" or some such thing. We just took Barrett back for x-rays every month for 6 months, then every other month, gradually phasing out the trip to the doctor because the tumor faded away, or was it priesthood blessings and faith? Barrett didn't play football because we were worried about his leg getting hurt and the tumor coming back, and also that he would be smushed by those big boys. So he took up golf, which is a needed skill for doctors.

I remember when Barrett was born, I thought he was the greatest little boy in the world. He was the first boy in the Ware family, the little boy my mom had waited so many years for. After four daughters and two granddaughters, it was time for a little boy. She loved him so much and always commented on what a "pretty baby" he was. And it was true. No little boy had such big dark eyes that could melt your heart. I remember being teary (Yes, me, teary) on his baptism day wondering what great things he would accomplish. And then the day he entered the mission field, heading to the Phillippines, ..what a worry for a mom. The day he returned was even greater. He was so handsome on his wedding day, he and his bride so happy. He is a great father to his beautiful daughter and handsome son.

And now they are embarking on a new phase of their lives. Moving again to Missouri for a pediactric residency at Children's Mercy Hospital in Kansas City, Missouri. He will make a great, caring, doctor.

We are so proud of you, son!

Happy Mothers Day

I want to wish all the Mothers in my world a very happy Mothers Day. Everyone in my world knows my feelings towards Mothers Day, and I am learning that other women share my opinion for many different reasons. But today I want to say how special the moms in my life are.
My mom was just beginning to see the "fruits of her labor" when our Heavenly Father called her home to him. But in my hosrt time as a mother while she was here, she helped me immensely. Her example of a home-maker and friend was priceless. I know I will never able to keep my home as beautiful as she did, or make cookies the way she did. But I hope to be able to love my children as much as she did.......So much for that before I ruin my makeup!

Another special Mom is the mother of my husband. She, too, has left this earthly life, but I was so lucky to know her. There was a time in her life she wondered if she would ever be a mother because her first three children died soon after she gave them birth. But she was blessed with 4 sons and a daughter, and extra-blessed to add 3 more to her family, another daughter and 2 sons, that she helped raise. She is a great example of a hard worker, and very spiritual. I love her for raising such a good son who treats me with the same respect he had for her.

Other special moms are the mothers of my grandchildren. These moms are so special to me. They have all gone through so many trials and difficult times, but the Lord is blessing them with such wonderful children. They each have different parenting styles, talents, and experiences, but they each make it work for their families. I love you all, Tammy, Nancy, and Chantel. Thanks for raising my grandchildren.

I also want to acknowledge the mothering that Nicky does for all these kids. Although she doesn't have her own children YET, she is a mom to all her nieces and nephews and loves them just as much. They come to her for her love, and I know she would give them the world.

Other moms that I look up to are my sisters. They have each gone through so many trials lately, as well. And although we sometimes wonder when it will end, I am amazed that we can all do what we have. I admire them so much and want them to know that I think they are wonderful women. All three of them. Linda is there to love our children, just as much as we all do. I hope you know I love you all.

And my sisters-in-laws...Thanks for your example and love. I am a better person because you are all teaching me how to keep going, even when everything seems stacked against me. I see your examples of what spirituality, love and devotion and I admire you so much. Thanks for accepting me into the family 31 years ago. I love you all.

So, Happy Mother's Day to you all!

A Nice Day

Yesterday was a beautiful day here in our little town. The weather was perfect with sunshine and not much wind. But the events of the day mad it even better. Yesterday was Lexi's baptism day. She told me she was a little bit nervous, which is very common, but she was so sweet about it. "I'm a little nervous, Grandma." We talked about what was going to happen. She was mostly nervous because she doesn't like water in her eyes.
Sometimes I wonder if children understand the importance of the step of baptism. Or do any of us for that matter. As adults we have a testimony of the importance of baptism, but do we understand the symbolism, the reasons, the need for it? It is a simple ceremony, but has lasting effects on us. I know this is something I need to study more. Put it on my list of things to do. Today, I am just focused on how much I love my granddaughter. Lexi was the first to make us grandparents. She is such a good example to her brothers. They are learning to call out her name when they need something. They follow her around all the time and she loves it. Both Koy and Kayden have such a cute way of saying her name. They make me chuckle when I hear them. They chase after her and do everything she does.
Lexi is a good student and an awesome reader. Learning just comes natural to her. She is the student every teacher loves to have because she just soaks in information.
I love all my wonderful grandchildren and look forward to the day of their own baptisms. I will do everything in my power to be there to share this experience with them.
Kids...I love you all.

Happy Birthday, Tammy!

Was it really 30 years ago that you were born? Yes, time does go by fast. Thirty years since we called up the old Logan hospital and asked if we could have a baby that day. I still remember seeing big burley Dr. Ed Budge carrying in this little bundle. Your dad was so proud of his little girl. Even all the climbing, mess making, etc, didn't stop us from loving you. (But Koy has you beat!) I used to think 30 years was a long time, but now I know it is all relative. You have brought so much happiness into our lives during this years. You were the one who made us parents for the first time. You are the one we "practiced" on and who had to be the example to all the others. You have gone through lots of tough times, but you are showing us that faith and prayer can help us get through anything.
Here's to hoping you have a great day, and a wonderful year. Hopefully you will look back next year and say it was a great year! Happy birthday!

News

Just a second here to let you all know that cousin Kimberli had a baby boy last night (Wednesday). I don't know any more than everyone is doing fine, and his name is Marcus Rasmussen. Julie, we almost had that third generation on May 5.

Thanks Everyone

Just want to tell everyone thanks for the happy birthday wishes to both Garth and I. Chelsie, I have to admit that either your computer clock or mine is an hour off. It was more like 5:45 instead of 4:00, but hey, I only get up early on a school day! Hope you got to sleep in on YOUR birthday. Again, thanks everyone, and may you all have happy birthdays as well.

Happy Birthday, Sweetheart

Today my husband is actually older than me, by about 12 hours or so. I want to wish him a very happy birthday. We love to see the look on people's faces when we tell them we were born one day apart at the same hospital.

I am so lucky to have him as my eternal companion. He has been the source of so much happiness. He certainly makes my life easier and much more comfortable. He seems to always put me before himself or anything else. He treats me like the queen he deserves to have.

Let me indulge and tell our story here.

After graduating from high school, my two friends went to Logan to go to college and I went to Ogden. Jay Mark entered the farm mechanics program at USU where he met Garth. The three of them, (Jay, Joy, and Garth) became very good friends for the next 3 semesters. Jay and Joy married in April (I think) and Garth went on his mission in June. During the next fall they encouraged me to write a letter to this friend of theirs serving his mission in California. Not knowing what I was getting into, I step up to the dare and wrote him a letter. He responded with many questions, and I answered them. The writing had begun. For the rest of his mission we corresponded, not totally every week, but regularly.

In June 1977, the day before Father's Day, Garth returned from him mission. His parents had gone to California to pick him up and they drove him together. Garth called me and made arrangements for us to met on Father's Day. He left his father on the first Father's Day home from his mission! True love!

I still remember seeing him coming down the step to my apartment in Ogden. I was so nervous, but happy to finally be meeting him. I knew I loved him and he was very special, but I didn't know what was going to happen.

We drove to the temple grounds, and even went into the visitor's center and watched the Joseph Smith movie...our first date. I am sure he was reliving his mission and giving the discussion to the missionaries there! We walked around the temple grounds and enjoyed talking. After walking everywhere there was to walk we returned to my apartment, where I had a big strawberry pie waiting. It was the pie I am sure, that sealed our fate. During the evening he turned to me and asked, "What would you say if I asked you to marry me?" Did I look stupid? Did he really think I would jump up and "Yes! Yes! Yes!"? If I did, I was sure he would say something like, "Well, I didn't ask you yet! I was just wondering what you would say." And anyone who knows Garth wouldn't put that past him! Always the kidder. So, not wanting to put myself out to be put on the spot, I responded to his question with, "Why don't you ask me and find out?" So he did, and I said yes.

And that is how we got started. Not an e-mail or on-line dating, just snail mail and old-fashioned letter writing. We were married just 2 months later, and are still happily married after 31 years.

Garth, thank you for being such a wonderful husband and father. You are the center of our family. All your children look up to you as an example and a sweet, caring father expects them all to do their best. They all know you will be there for them when they need you. We all love you so much. Have a very happy birthday!