Sometimes Life Is Like That

I had a college roommate who sang in the choir at Weber State College and I sang in the Institute Choir.  In the spring of the year we both went on a singing tour.  I had just returned when Pat's group left.  She was excited about going and I was excited to share the excitement with her because of the great time I had on my trip.  Her group was going to California.  For a girl from New Mexico being near the ocean was a big thrill.

I remember sitting at my desk doing my homework with the radio going and hearing an announcement that there had been a tragic accident at San Francisco Bay park involving the students from the Weber State College choir.  I sat in horror wondering if Pat was alright.  The TV finally told the story, but I later got more details from Pat when she returned the next day.

Apparently they were all having a lot of fun playing at the beach.  Many of the group were expert swimmers and joked about the warning signs posted to warn swimmers about the rip tide.  Pat didn't dare to venture into the water very far, but one of her close friends did.  She watched him as he went out further and further into the bay. The group started yelling for him to return, but it appeared that he was not able to hear them.  She started to get worried when she noticed he was waving his arms and acting like he was in trouble.  Another friend saw the situation and rushed in to help the first boy, but he took got in trouble with the rip tide.  The entire choir stood there watching as their two friends were caught in the rip tide and carried under the water and out to sea.  The patrol hurried in to find them, but they never did. 

The choir members were so upset. They had tried to get the first boy to return to the shore, but he couldn't see the situation as clearly as they could. He wasn't aware of the danger he was in.  The second boy knew the danger and tried to help out, but got caught in the danger as well.

I remember sitting at the Fine Events Center waiting for the bus to return with the choir members.  I was there to pick up Pat and make sure she had a ride home.  It was the middle of the night but that didn't dampen the tears as we all asked questions about what had happened.  Pat said it was terrible seeing the trouble they were getting into and not being able to communicate with them so they would get out of the water.  The boy thought he knew what he was doing, but the danger was there, too close for him to see until it was too late.  The bodies were never recovered, but the image lived on.

Sometimes life is like that.  Others might be telling us they can see the danger, but we think we know exactly what we are doing, totally unaware of the dangers lurking right there next to us.  We need to learn that our loved ones only want the best for us when they warn us of the danger.  They don't want to go home without all members of the choir/family.  We need to remember they are looking at another angle, one that might be better suited to see the dangers near us.  They want us to be happy and enjoy the beach with them, but they don't want us to get in a situation that might harm us.  

They want us out of the rip tide.  

A New Book

I recently purchased a book from Deseret Book for my iPad.  They advertised a new book written by the author of The Peacemaker.  I loved that book, and his other book The Holy Secret so I decided to get this one as well, and I haven't been disappointed. 

 Falling To Heaven has given voice to some things I have been thinking of for some time.  He talks about look down in order to look up, similar to President Monson's talk about looking up to get answers.  However, Brother Ferrell stresses that we much humble ourselves and look down, in the manner of praying, in order to see where we should be heading.  The introduction talks about how people tell us we should be happy with ourselves, but in reality, Jesus taught us to love others and forget about our self.  When the world tells us to stop being so hard on ourselves, to look at our strengths, Jesus says that He will show us our weakness.  And then our job is to make that weakness our strength. 

He then goes on to explain about the Truth in Contradiction.  Like in walking, we move forward because we push backward.  A good basketball rebounder doesn't move toward the basket, but away from it. For a golfer to hit the ball hard it sometimes helps to swing easy; to hit the ball high, swing down.  The scriptures say "He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall fine it."  In Lehi's dream of the Tree of Life, the one thing that one group of people did when they tasted of the fruit, having held to the rod of iron,....."they came forth and fell down and partook oft he fruit of the tree."  They didn't reach up to get the fruit, they fell down.  They became humble and fell to the ground. The Zoramites raised themselves up on the Rameumptom (what a word!), thinking they would be closer to Christ, they were better than the poor souls around them.  They even prayed that they were thankful for how good they were!  They felt so good about what they were doing, how righteous they were.  But the Lord made it clear that this was not a good thing. 
 
In the next chapters he talks about how being down isn't always good, either.....Herein lies the Great Paradox.  How do we find the balance between down and up?  We shouldn't look down on others and say we are up ourselves.  We can't look up at others and say we are down on ourselves.  We have to realize that we are focusing on the Savior, seeing our weaknesses, and working to make them our strengths, and realize that the Savior is the one who will help us in all ways. 

I love the titles of the chapters:  The False Doctrine of Up; The False Burden of Down;Unacceptable and Acceptable Sins (Do you mean some sin is acceptable? No, but some people think so, or in other words, think their actions and words are acceptable when in realize they are sins.)  Superiority by Association (Don't we all know people who think if they associate with certain people they will become superior themselves, or they can now associate with certain people because they have reached a certain place in their lives where they are 'as good as them', leaving the rest of their associates behind in the dust?)

All these types of 'upness' are discussed throughout the book, with the emphasis on learning to overcome this in our own selves, or learning how to recognize it in others and therefore learn not to get 'down' on others who we see suffering from this upness.  While at the same time not thinking we are better because we don't have the upness because if we think we don't and that others do, we make ourselves better, again.  The Great Paradox.

Right now I am reading about how we sometimes withhold forgiveness at our own peril.  This goes along with my mantra  "Eternity depends on how we view those who mistreat us."  If we say we forgive someone but refuse to have any association with them (thinking of family, loved ones, workers, friends, etc.) we our self need to repent.  As Bro. Ferrell says "We are unwilling to pay the purchase price of forgiveness and are using it instead as a crass currency of exchange."  "Any withholding of love is itself a sin.  So to have held it back on account of what another has done is itself an act for which we must repent.  .......when I as the harmed party respond to this request by giving up my resentment and my grudge, what I am doing is repenting--repenting of my failing to love.  Forgiveness is simply the word we use to describe this kind of repentance....This is the most crucial type of repentance of all.   "  He talks about how the Lord's example of prayer, known as the Lord's Prayer, has only one item that has a condition...""Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors."  And right after Christ closed his prayer he taught "your heavenly Father will also forgive you; But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses."

 If we withhold our love, our association, our friendship, or our family ties from others because of their sins, we have not truly forgiven.  We may say we have forgiven them, and we probably have, but we need to forgive ourselves for withholding that love that Christ says we must show for everyone.

Why do I gravitate to books that force me to look at myself and see where I need to forgive?  I know it is because I hold some strong feelings toward others and need to let them go so I can become a better person.  My book is striped with highlighted comments, which is wonderful because then I can go back and read what I have been thinking about.  I love the interactive scriptures as well because I can then mark in my scriptures the verses that are brought to life. 

I am anxious to read Bro. Bednar's book "Increase in Learning".  I am so thankful that the church leaders feel the need to write books to help us.  Reading their words and looking up the scriptures they use to bring out their points, helps me in my scripture study.  I love reading the scriptures, but reading them in context with the words of the apostles and other people who teach through the scriptures helps me see ways I can apply the scriptures in my life.  I get so much 'pondering' done when I read books along with the scriptures, and then write about my thoughts. 

If you are looking for a good book, I suggest "Falling to Heaven: The Surprising Path to Happiness" by James Ferrell.

March

Where has the past month gone?  Time has really been passing quickly, although when I look back I see that we have experienced so much during this month.  Maybe that is why I feel so tired all the time.

This month I can say I dodged a serious bullet.  I have spent the past two week treating an infected knee that could have turned very serious.  I started having the old tingling feeling in my leg that I usually get when I start a bout of cellulitis but I got a big bump on my knee, which got red, hot, and very sore.  I was told I would need to go to Price to get IV meds to get rid of the infection.  I put it off thinking it would get better, but on Monday morning I knew I had to get help, quickly.  So we went to the hospital.  Infection, yes, but more than we thought.  The large bump on the knee was an abcess.  The doctor ordered an ultra-sound to find exactly where the abcess was, how deep, etc.  It had not yet gotten to the kneecap, so he was able to open it up and drain it right there.  And drain it did!  The doctor and the assistant (male) were so excited to see all the infection shooting out.  They said I made their day.  I'm glad they were excited, but it hurt like heck!  I was then on IV antibiotics for 4 days, along with packing the wound so all the infection will come out and allow it to heal probably.  We are still packing it after 14 days.  Because of the fluid in my leg it drains clear water each time we remove the packing.  So fun!

I really feel that if I hadn't been prompted on that Monday morning to get to the hospital that morning instead of waiting for the afternoon, my leg would have been in trouble.  I remember getting ready for school thinking that I would go to school, then go to the clinic to get a referal to the hospital.  As I stood to do my hair and make-up, I knew I couldn't wait and had to get there now.  So, even though I didn't have lessons prepared (I did have lesson plans, though, just not the papers run off and ready), and I didn't have a substitute (secretary gone, principal gone, call your own sub), I left it up to others to find a substitute and left as soon as I could.  I am sure I would have been in a sad situation if I had not gone.  I'm glad I listened to my body, and to the Spirit that whispered to I had to go now. 

Sometimes it takes a big pain in the leg to get my attention.  But when I listen, I am blessed.